Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Waiting

Well we decided to make the big jump and Rick is going to have his V-reversal surgery in march! The doctors say there is a 50/50 chance it will work....so it kinda makes me wonder if its worth it. At almost 4 thousand bucks....its totally in Gods Hands. I really want to be able to have another baby, more than anything right now. We already have names picked out, does that mean I am insane?
But with a new baby comes a whole new set of challenges and blessings....and I wonder...how will I be able to love another child like I love Mary? Shes my baby girl, and she will always be...but what happens when another baby comes? Its like the minute that I first held her in my arms, I was so in love with that precious little girl, I never thought I could love someone like that...you know? A love so deep you would do anything for them...to protect them, nurish them and make sure they are happy.
I am still trying to process it all. A huge part of my heart is gone when she is with her dad, and I miss her so very much...and I know having another baby would never in any way fill that void.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Your comments make my heart happy! Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you think! Healthy constructive criticism or opinions are welcomed but Negative Comments or Rude comments will not be posted.